I don't know about you but I have made many poor decisions on my way to God. But God was faithful and merciful in forgiving me and I don't look back or beat myself up over it. God said, He has cast our sins into the depths of the sea, never to be brought up against us any more. If God can forget them, then so must we. He also says our sins are as far away as the East is from the West.
as far as the east is from the west,
so far has he removed our transgressions from us. (NIV)
David says east and west not north and south. The distance between north and south is finite. You can only go so far north and you must then start going south; the same with going south. You can travel east or travel west forever. The distance between east and west is infinite. I'm no scholar but I looked this up and this is what I found out from those who do about these things.
I do know we have a heart changed by the healing power of God. His forgiveness is eternal, his love is unconditional.
Here is some lyrics from a song by Casting Crowns:
Jesus can you show me
Just how far the East is from the West
Cause I can’t bear to see the man I’ve been
Come rising up in me again
In the arms of your mercy I find rest
Cause you know just how far the East is from the West
From one scarred hand to the other
I know you’ve washed me white
Turned my darkness into light
I need your peace to get me through
To get me through this night
I can’t live by what I feel
But by the truth your word reveals
I’m not holding on to you
But you’re holding on to me
You’re holding on to me
HE IS HOLDING ON TO YOU...take hold of that thought and don't let go!